love despite or compatibility?
There is a saying "We like people because and we love people despite". I always had this thought that yes we do like people because of their nice treats and we love people despite there "I wanna kill them now" Traits. But is that true? Do we actually love people despite whatever?
In fact, I think not. I think that we over romanticize the idea of love. we choose to continue or we choose to stop based on the compatibility.
and let's explain what being compatible is "able to exist or occur together without problems or conflicts" meaning that you can love someone so much and do not co exist well.
or the other way around, you might not love someone but you happen to be at an ease.
But let's be clear here. Before you choose love, compatibility over chemistry.
You need some few steps before going on and loving someone else. you must have some steps in self love, self appreciation and self worth.
first thing first
- You need to take care of yourself. As if it's your wedding day everyday.
- You need to practice positive speech. Where you speak to yourself positively
- You need to know your worth, set your boundaries and never accept anyone to break them
- Acknowledge the pain, the wrong and the messed up on you and work on it before bleeding on someone else that didn't do anything
- Make yourself a priority.
Now, You are ready for love. Before you follow the chemistry. You need some steps:
- You need to know that person quite well. See your common points and create a point where you meet
- Ask yourself honestly: "can I tolerate that?"
- Do we have quite close objects?
- Where this is going.
So now you understand, which team I am on.
What about you?